Yes! Hey! I got your pizza for you! – Thank you!
– No problem, dude. Uhm… Somebody ate some. Woah! Uh, I don’t know who did that. – Well, whats on your-
– Gotta figure that out. Is that sauce on your mouth? No, there’s no sauce. Is that – what is that on your shirt? That’s not sauce. That’s a pepperoni! “That’s blood..” Blood? I got… *sighs* I got stabbed. It’s a tough job. Every Delivery Service Ever. Why is my food taking so long, and why is the car moving so slow? Don’t forget to tip! Next pickups in five miles. Ugh! Oh, Seamless is way better than Grubhub. James? Bobby! I haven’t seen you since high school! Yeah, you look like you’re doing well for yourself! Yeah! Well, I uh, I run my own business now. And, uh, just bought this house. Got a Tesla. I’m, I’m killing it frankly. You’re a… Food delivery guy? That’s cool, that’s neat! No, this is, this is just for fun, this is a joke.
– Is the food here? – Bobby?!
– Carol?! – Oh my god, it’s been literally since like high school!
– You two dated, right? Yeah, until he brutally dumped me for not being cool enough, and then you went under pursue being like a world famous rapper, right?! M’hm, yeah. My god, I think what you specifically said was that you’re gonna be the next Ja Rule and that my lame ass was the only thing standing in your way? *laughing* – Well, I’m glad that happened because we wouldn’t be married right now.
– I know, so uhm, how’s the music stuff goin’? – Good?
– So good, so good. Don’t forget to tip. Why did they give me like thirty forks? Yes! – Hi!
– Got your postmates.
– Thank you.
– Ooh, nice shirt! Okay listen, I have a boyfriend so don’t look at me like that, you creep. Oh – uh no, this is just a genetic condition. My face is stuck like this. Also, I have chronic dry lip syndrome. It’s kind of problem. – Oh, I’m sorry.
– Uhm, everything okay babe.
– M’hm. Hello there! – Uhm…
– Don’t worry, he’s not hitting on you, his face is just stuck like that. Oh, no this is genuine this time. I am hitting on your boyfriend. I’d totally do him. Oh, well, love a man in uniform. What?! Ugh, the food’s cold already… – Hey, here’s your ice cream. Sorry took so long is the line this flippin’ crazy, dude.
– Yeaah…
– And I get anxiety in social situations.. – So I was all like “AHHH,” you know how I can be.
– Totally, yes. I’m also going through this breakup right now, and it’s like it’s cool ’cause we’re still friends except we’re not friends because like I want to be friends, but she’s being all like weird about it, right?
– Yeaah… – And it’s weird because I thought it would be like settle down by now, right? And my parents were all like.. “When are you gonna get married?” And I’m just like “I’m here mom.” Why don’t you love me?” “Show me some love like you love my brother.” I deserve love! Okay, I’m gonna open this door and hope he doesn’t rob me. Hey, when is the food getting here? – Any minute. They have a drone delivering it now!
– Whaat?! Modern life truly is a marvel to behold. Oh my god, it’s here! I’ll be right back! Roger that, target acquired. Launching hamburger. Oh my god… oh my god… I asked for Thousand Island dressing! Why is he driving in circles around my block? – Hey, postmates!
– Hi! Thank you — oh uhm, sorry I actually ordered lemon lime. – Oh, no problem. I’ll get that for you.
– Okay. – What juice was that?
– Hmm…? Oh, I ordered your lemon lime. Oh… – Grubhub?
– Oh thank you. Oh, I’m so sorry. I ordered a lemon lime.
– Oh crap. Oh, don’t worry about it. I got you.
– Oh, thank you. – Alright…
– I’m so sorry — oh! That’s me, got another delivery! Ooh lemon lime. Uhm… I actually Uber here, so… – It would be possible for you to give me a ride home?
– I have to be here when my lemon lime arrives.
– Oh right, same. Every Delivery Service Ever. I haven’t seen you since high school! Yeah, I’m so sorry. I looked right in the camera. I think you specifically said that you’re gonna be the next Ja — Okay, I have a boyfriend so don’t — Hey guys. Thanks so much for watching this video. I hope my delivery was good. I am an actor. If you want a very special video just for you, click the box on the left. Or if you want something weird, click that box on the right. Goodbye!

100 thoughts on “EVERY FOOD DELIVERY EVER”

  1. 3:37 i was laughing so hard at this 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

  2. You forgot the humongous fat delivery guy who has a heart attack while knocking on the door and the guy who leaves him on the floor dieing and just slowly shuts the door and the guy who’s car catches on fire infront of your house and trying to steal the pizza robot and craps himself while doing it and the guy delivering in the hood and gets shot but crawls to your door with his legs blown off and when he asks for a tip you shut the door

  3. And the dumb boyfriend goes to 3:48 because he notice something wrong on his burger and not what happened to his ______

  4. Damien yelling in his best friend's face that he deserves love while shovelling ice cream into his mouth is a big ass mood

  5. 3:45 he did the right thing. Rule number 1: if someone is hurt and they’re carrying food, check if the food is good first before checking the actual person. In that case if they do make it alive, the food can at least be in good condition. If they don’t, just eat it.

  6. Bfmng mglg(n)m&bcyhymgvynfc&g55(*h$$*5t((5*5fe4$eewee33333e3e4ki,gunbfbdggthgegwrrwggergtntdhrswgfnsgbftbesfgesrgeadafgfsgdwegrrthsnrgdfgdnrbegregggsdbfgfsbgfd bb gfnrhnbbhgdfffbfbgrgrgryyryyryyrygdggdggdggdggdggdgggdgdgdggdggdggdggdggdggdgggdygfyyfyfyfyyfyyfyyffyfyufyffufufyfyyffyyffyfyfyyfyffyfyfyfyrggrtrgrgwbrgw

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